well
F*** it
i'm trying v hard to refrain frm using the word
coz i use to pride myself for steering clear of lots of vulgarities tt i noe but these days i jus cant b bothered kinda despise myself abit for tt
im not watching niptuck now
coz i dont get e tv
and the tv in the living rm dont work in my rm for god noes wat reason so watever
my bro jus insist on not lowering the vol on the other tv so tt i can clear wat e hell is going on tt show which doesnt haf subtitles aniway
but wth
its tv
n the fact tt my printer is dead
n my laptop has no wireless for the whole day
n i asked mybro for help n he wasnt too enthu
n i figured all finally aft one whole day tt
the freaking wireless switch jus wasnt on.
dont tell mi y its off
shit

i was swallowing all the shouting down
turning down my vol so much tt it sounded unnatural so i jus haf to escape into the quiet of my own rm
i realize tt i get irritated w internet altho i no nothing much on it
sounds bad
but i jus hate the feelg of inadequacy
n i dont wan pple to help
coz i hate to c tt face they gif when they arent too enthu in helpg
well tts y i try to help pple when i can
when im in the right mind at least
but not now
not at this moment
where my radio is going on realli loud
coz if its not loud enuff i might jus scream to fill the rm w noise

now i understand abit of jus hoping onto a bus n going sumwhere aniwhere
but watever
haa
as if i can do it

im going to japan.
- for 3 days in dec la
not for gd
i wish onli la

finished mystic rivers
one hell of a bk
the guy grab a pedophile's head in a carpark n smashed it on the floor so mani times tt his face is gone
jus aft i finised tt bk
i took a nap
n i dreamt tt i grabbed someone's head in a carpark n smashed it on the floor so mani times tt his face is gone too
it was a violent dream
hope the violent streak is jus in e dream too heh

its a sad story i tink
dave - is pathetic
worthy of my pity i mean


pa·thet·ic (p-thtk) also pa·thet·i·cal (--kl)
adj.
1. Arousing or capable of arousing sympathetic sadness and compassion: "The old, rather shabby room struck her as extraordinarily pathetic" John Galsworthy.
2. Arousing or capable of arousing scornful pity.

we'll in order not to become a pedophile after being molested when he was young
in order to kill THE BOY in him
w his split personality n stuff
he killed tt man whu was f-ing a little boy prostitute

i shud manage my temper coz its causing mi to b dysfunctional
deep breathing.
i feel better alreadi
mayb in a sec of two
ill b chatting to pple using emocons w smileys
but its freaki to tink tt i might not b smiling when i was typing it
haaa
tts wat a com is gd for

n my bro jus came it
to gif mi shit
daxiaosheng??@!!??!
cum on
i was trying so bad to keep it xiao sheng lor
n mind u i asked for help n u didnt gif it to mi
i fixed tt damn com myself
theres no one there to depend on except for urself
onli out of laziness or uselessness do i ask for help i guess
shit