read abt a fren's woes n troubles.. but dunnoe wat to say dunnoe how to help so i didnt call.. tink it might not help even if i say that there r many pple out there w similar probs and thots.. by saying tt prob doesnt help coz it doesnt solve the root of the prob.
the solution is kinda by fate i tink.. while im a fatalist in that sense but only to a certain extent

Noun
1.fatalist - anyone who submits to the belief that they are powerless to change their destiny

i dont really noe wats my take in these situations, an escapist way of leaving ur troubles behind is to not think abt tt.. which is wat mani pple say they cant do.

i dont even noe wat is my pt abt writing all this animore
mayb its jus tt i wud like to help but i cant
mayb its jus tt i cant even help myself
mayb its jus tt my work is calling out to mi again until i cant concentrate on wat i wan to say
mayb its jus tt its too personal for me to say it

High/Low context
a fren say tt im a low context if im a listener.. i need pple to say things out to me blatantly... i prob was lidat last time.. but now im better.. i hope. being surrounded by many high context pple actualli trained mi up to b more acute in tt sense

i say im a high context person when i speak.
actually my thoughts are usually v blatant n mean
but i tend to curb them in hope not to hurt others w some caustic remarks
sometimes its gets so sickening i jus cant b bothered
but on a whole.. yes i wud smile at someone even tho i dont feel like it and i wont ask pple to eat shit n die even if i mean it, well at least not in their faces

is this being hypocritical?
it might b
it might not b
i generally dont do things against my wishes
i jus dont do things tt i wish too
i seek a compromise coz i cant promise wat i wont do in a confrontation.

watever
a polychronic self tells mi its 3+ in a day i haf tons of work undone but well its midday...
a monochronic self.. hate it when pple r late

life is full of contradiction
dont i jus love being a gemini
ah.. self fulfilling prophecies again!

im scaring myself